Sonic Colors review

12 years.



12 years since Sonic Adventure was released, and since then almost every 3D sonic game has had the curse of either being incredibly mediocre, or downright satanically bad.



Even when a 3D Sonic game seemed to be playing ok, it was set back with a horrible gimmick that often times make the gameplay bad.



Well, now Sonic Colors have been released for the Wii, and me and my buddy had the chance to play it, while wearing a nifty little Sonic Hat.



Plot:  Because plotpoints are always the most important point in any Sonic game.  Nah, I'm just kidding.  I will never attempt to take ANY plot seriously from Sonic games.  Thank God there's a simple and straightforward plot this time around.  If they pulled the same shit they did with Sonic 06, and make a confusing convoluted plot involving a princess, I would have to fucking strangle someone.  Eggman created an intergalactic theme park, and is capturing aliens to harness their energy to power the theme park and energize his mind control beam to take control of Sonic's planet.  Yes folks, it seems Planet Mobius is back, and guess what?  Not a single conversation with any human (other than Eggman) in this game.  THANK YOU JESUS.



Graphics:  Good Jumping Jesus, this game is absolutely beautiful.  This is easily one of the best looking games on the Wii.  Every background and level is lush with detail and vivid color.



Music: Not much to say about this, the songs are catchy, gorgeous, and about 6 of them are on my I-Pod now.



Gameplay:  Ah, yes.  The shining moment of the game.  For the most part, it's your typical "run from point A to point B" Sonic game, with a twist.  There are powerups you can collect called Wisps, that allow you to do different things, and they are all useful.  Unlike most 3D Sonic Games with gimmicks, these Wisps are not absolutely necessary to complete the game.  In Unleashed, the boring, slow Werehog stages were absolutely essential to complete the game.  Black Knight required your sword.  Sonic Colors?  There are only a small handful of the over 30 levels that require you to use Wisps to continue.  Speaking of levels, there are 6 worlds, each with 6 levels plus a boss battle.  There are even some moments in stages that switch to class styled 2D gameplay.  The final world has only 3 acts.  Sonic also has a few new moves at his disposal.  Yes, he has his Homing Attack and he can speed boost, but he also has a Slide Kick, a Wall Jump, and a Ground Stomp.  Hmmm, looks like he learned a few things from Super Mario.  Speaking of Mario, I can't help but get a huge Mario Galaxy vibe from this.  There are several levels where Sonic is racing around the stars and hopping from planet to planet, the main antagonist is holding planets hostage, and there is a level where you have to lure a missle into a forcefield to destroy it, like in Galaxy.  Not that it's a bad thing, imitation is the best form of flattery, and Sonic Colors did it quite well.



Voices:  Oh boy, here we go.  Usually, at this point in ANY Sonic game review, the score takes a huge plummet.  However, it's not going to happen this time.  Sonic and friends have all new voices, and they sound great.  Sonic isn't incredibly annoying, and Tails sounds like a real frickin boy this time.  Eggman is still being voiced by the ever lovable Mike Pollock.  Everybody making MORE petitions to change the voices THIS time can fucking blow me.  The scriptwriting is great too.  I found myself laughing, but not at how horrible this game could of been, but at ACTUAL HONEST TO GOD HUMOR.  It's as if I was watching a modern version of SatAM.  The humor is great, the writing is brilliant, and there was barely a dull moment to be seen.  Oh, and Sonic breaks the 4th wall a few times too.



Final Thoughts: This game is fantastic.  Finally, a great Sonic game everyone can enjoy.  No gamebreaking glitches, no earraping voices, no annoying gimmicks, just great action packed fun.  I could only find one major gripe with this game.  It's waaaaaay to short.  Me and Demyx beat it in a little over 5 hours.  Normally I don't have a problem with short games, provided that they have some filler to hold you overafter the game is beaten, but Sonic Colors doesn't have any of that.  There's just the Main Game, and, that's about it.  Other than that, I would highly recommend this game for any Wii owner.  Oh, and the plushie Sonic hat kicks ass too.